10. The Comfort of Strangers

Ian McEwan is an author that is famous for his use of gratuitous violence and sadomasochism in his books. If it were a trashy love novel, we might just consider it in there for shock value, not really anything important to analyze. But considering we're reading this book in a college seminar... it must go a little deeper than that. I assert that McEwan's use of violence and sadomasochism, especially in Comfort of Strangers is in there to elicit our own innate desires, and make us realize that although sadomasochism seems like a faraway desire, only for the freaks, we all have a little bit of it in ourselves, it just needs to be released.

McEwan introduces Mary and Colin as a normal couple with normal relationship problems. They are losing touch with one another, barely communicate, sometimes even fall asleep during sex. He does this to make them relatable. They take a trip, probably to try to add some excitement back into their relationship. We can also relate to this. Vacations do give us a break from the gloomy, dreary day to day. They constantly get lost on their way to dinner and feel the city is intentionally too labrynthian for any visitor to be able to find their way. All of these things make Mary and Colin the quintessential normal boring couple.

This makes it so when they fall victim to Robert and Caroline's sadomasochistic ways, it shocks you. You don't understand why they keep going back to Robert, even when they can tell how crazy it is, and you are shocked that they too get into this strange sexual fetish of inflicting and receiving pain and punishment. But because you are now used to comparing yourself to Mary and Colin, you ask yourself:  could I too fall victim to this way of thinking? Could this sexually arouse me, too, if I met the person who was just convincing enough? Who presented it in a way that made it not scary, but fascinating and new?

These questions are ones of self exploration. This is a quality not many books have. Although you can delve into the personality and life story of the characters, rarely are you given a chance to take a step back and reflect on how it relates to you. This gives the book a more universal meaning and significance, which I really appreciate. Although I'm still not into the whole sadomasochism thing, I now am more conscious of my personal predilection for violence and my desires in general. 

What we learn from The Comfort of Strangers are the downsides of getting an “authentic experience”.  For much of this course we have been discussing the different forms of travelers, from those who want to go deep to those who just want to coast along the surface, not really seeing a place for what it truly is.  So is the authentic travel experience not safe in some way?  Of course, Colin and Mary’s case is an extreme one, but is it a call on McEwen’s part for fanny-packing travelling?  I wouldn’t think a writer would advocate for that.  It is either go big or go home with Venice.  As we saw in Death in Venice and now in The Comfort of Strangers, Venice leads to mental frenzy.  A visitor to Venice has to decide whether they will plunge into this frenzy or keep the reassuring distance of a tourist.  Aschenbach chose the mental frenzy or perhaps it chose him and Colin and Mary do as well.  Venice shows its first signs of ulterior motives when it gives Mary the strange bug bites after sleeping in the street the night they meet Robert.  Venice is literally and metaphorically infectious.  Perhaps submitting to the frenzy requires a sort of sullying process in which one has to confront and come to terms with the dirtiness (literal and metaphorical) of Venice.  Or maybe these bug bites are the first warning flags to Colin and Mary that Robert is definitely not who they think he is.  Maybe they function as a sign from the city to stop before it is too late.  If a traveler is in search of the authentic he or she has to be prepared for anything because in a foreign place the most bizarre things can be authentic.  Just because something is authentic does not necessarily mean it should be pursued when travelling.  A tourist may not fit into this authenticity as much as they want to.  And sometimes that is a good, safe thing.  The authentic seduces Colin and Mary, which is always the danger.  We think the authentic is innocent precisely because it is authentic, because it acts as place of potential profound, meaningful connection away from the surface level, mechanical travel that encompasses a city.

The irony in the title of the book The Comfort of Strangers is apparent from the interactions that the main characters have with the brutal antagonists.  However, when considering the travel industry, this book also highlights how tourism and comfort have a unique relationship.
 
It is expected that businesses that have a tourist clientele would treat their guests with respect and extra courtesy.  This is reflected in the hospitality industry and in the book.  At the hotel, Colin and Mary are extremely pleased with how the maid makes their bed, and how anything can be brought up to them.  In fact, they grow to expect this coddling.
 
Therefore, when they do not receive such respect they are shocked.   This is shown in the book when Colin and Mary find a seat in the square labeled as one “of the greatest tourist destinations.”   The couple cannot find a seat, they cannot get service, and the waiter, once he arrives, is rude and condescending.  It is clear that the businesses do not always care about what their clientele expect.
 
This scene highlights a unique aspect of tourism.  While destinations certainly cater towards their tourist clients (for example Venice as a city, was willing to cover up illness in Death of Venice), sometimes they refuse this courtesy.  Interestingly we see this happen in a place that is overly saturated with tourist activity, suggesting that the rude waiter in the square did not need to fight for tourists because there were just so many of them.
 
This all highlights that we need to keep an eye out when judging the comfort of strangers.  We, as tourists, are commodities and if we want respect and courtesy we just need to know where to go to find it (tourist destinations, but not the oversaturated ones).  This idea of tourists as commodities is clearly and creepily reflected in the book: Colin was a commodity for the antagonists and ended dead.

 
This novella was a terrifying story. Other books we read in class all had some gloomy, morbid aspects but this one struck me as the most disturbing. By the time I finished, the first thing that came to mind other than all the twisted emotions that engrossed me was that I ought to be much more careful of strangers and not to trust people abroad no matter how cordial they appear to be. Robert, although not a native, is an aristocratic-born resident of this foreign city who kindly offers our protagonist tourists, Mary and Colin, a way to some “good food,” to his bar where locals hang out. I thought Robert would function as a wonderful bridge to the authentic experiences for the two tourists who carry maps everywhere, look for the “ideal restaurants,” often eating earlier than dinner time or returning back to the one they dined before, and use the magic phrase “we’re on a holiday” whenever they’re in an imperfect state of their tourist experiences, such as when the heat is unusually oppressive, when they are lost, having forgotten their maps, or when Colin decides to skip shaving before going out to a café. I thought the story would be about how Mary and Colin are transformed from tourists to real travelers due to Robert’s generous help or something. My innocent guess turned out to be wrong of course. By the time Robert’s Canadian wife Caroline enters the scene, the mystery gradually builds up, creating suspense that got me flipping page after another, only to get struck by a shocking end.
 
“On holiday,” together in this foreign city, Colin and Mary enjoy the comfort of strangers. In their hotel life, the maid, unknown to them and encountered only once, is a stranger who comes to their empty hotel room to clean up their mess: “Unused to hotel life, they were inhibited by this intimacy with a stranger they rarely saw” (12). The maid is a stranger to them who touches, rearranges, and organizes their personal belongings such as dirty clothes and shoes; Mary and Colin, “rapidly, however, [comes] to depend on her and [grow] lazy with their possessions” (12). At “a restaurant that suited them[,] the two waiters who served them” are accounted as “friendly but pleasingly distant” (96). Outside in the streets, they find themselves in crowds of strangers. Each morning “with their money, sunglasses and maps, [they] join[] the crowds who swarmed across the canal bridges and down every narrow street.” As tourists, they have no associations and ties, only knowing themselves, they “dutifully fulfill[] the many tasks of tourism the anciety city imposed,” visiting churches, museums, palaces, and shopping streets for souvenirs.  In fact, meeting Robert and going to his bar is the first time they talk with locals; they “experience the pleasure, unique to tourists, of finding themselves in a place without tourists, of making a discovery, finding somewhere real [and are] gratified to be talking at last to an authentic citizen” (29). Even when they get lost despite their maps, they consult the sun rather than asking people around. Likewise, Colin and Mary are find comfort in this foreign city of strangers.
 
However, blinded by the comfort of strangers, perhaps too much comfort, they come to a tragic end. Just like how they trust the maid with their privacy and feel secure among the strangers on the streets, Mary and Colin also innocently trust Robert, another stranger, and his seeming generosity. However, by the end, Robert and his wife are not to have been trusted at all. Robert had been taking photographs of Colin from their first arrival and making psychotic plans with his submissive wife.  
 
After the strange visit at Robert and Caroline’s, Mary and Colin are drawn much together. Although they are not transformed from tourists to travelers as I innocently guessed at first, their relationship changes after their brief stay at Robert and Caroline’s. In the beginning, they are found sleeping in “separate beds” and “not on speaking terms.” After their visit to Robert and Caroline’s, however, they are in love, talk a lot, and discuss politics of sex and formulate theories about memory and childhood. They do not mention their strange visit at Robert’s until Mary remembers the photograph of Colin she saw at Robert’s. While they have been wandering around, engaging in tourist experiences, keeping to themselves in the comfort of strangers, Robert had been taking photos of Colin. At the end, when trapped in Robert and Caroline’s evil plans, Colin says he’ll comply to whatever Robert wants him to do as long as he gets Mary to the hospital. While the visit to Robert and Caroline’s reignites Mary and Colin’s love and draws the two closer, it is also Robert and Caroline’s where their love is broken with Colin’s death and Mary’s trauma.
 
In this foreign city, Colin and Mary have only been going to well known tourist areas, full of strangers—other tourists with cameras or locals. Because they know no one in the city other than themselves, the crowds of people are mere strangers who they do not associate with and pay not a lot of attention to. In the comfort of strangers, Mary and Colin fail to notice any mishaps, Robert stalking and taking pictures of beautiful Colin and designing evil plans to murder him. 

Generally speaking, the most obvious (and assumingly deliberate) motifs in McEwan’s “The Comfort of Strangers” are sex and sexuality, topics that, whether it be in a novel or a movie, tend to keep any audience interested.
 
Before visiting “the strangers”(Robert and Caroline), both Mary and Colin feel a sense of disconnect between themselves and their relationship towards one another. Although on vacation in a romantic getaway like Venice, Mary and Colin can’t seem to find themselves, and if they struggle with their own identities, they will obviously struggle with understanding each other’s. Throughout the novel, McEwan makes a point of noting their use of maps and disorientation within the city. Each time they uncover themselves becoming bitter with frustration over the unfamiliarity of Venice, they have to remind each other that they are “on holiday” (McEwan, 12). This struggle is mainly mentioned in the beginning of the novel, acting as symbolism for Mary and Colin’s relationship.
 
Once in Robert and Caroline’s house, gender roles become a prominent discussion topic. Caroline foreshadows her struggle with Robert’s dominance when she cynically mentions that it’s nearly impossible to have an all-female play. Mary claims that “you could have a play about two woman who have only just met sitting on a balcony talking.” (67) Caroline’s abruptly disagrees: “Oh yes. But they are probably waiting for a man. When he arrives, they’ll stop talking and go indoors. Something will happen…” Caroline is subtly noting the affect of a man’s constant need to declare his masculinity, and how that need tends to belittle women. Mary is clearly influenced by this because she brings the argument to bed when she discusses the potential difference between male and female orgasms. Mary, recalling evidence from a news report, thinks they are the same, but Colin disagrees. The role of dominance within sexuality is also mentioned, when, for the first time in the novel, Mary and Colin become open enough with each other that they can discuss BDSM.
 
Like their relationship between one another, there is also a similar disconnect and dissonance between themselves and the city. Only after visiting Robert and Caroline do Colin and Mary begin to rejuvenate their sexuality. Venice is given a sense of anonymity, and Mary and Colin rarely, if ever, mention famous places and monuments within the city. McEwan does a fantastic job of emphasizing Robert and Caroline’s role as catalysts, rather than giving Italy the credit. 

Odd as their encounter with Robert and Caroline may seem, Colin and Mary’s relationship ultimately benefit from it. Starting off as a perfectly plain, ideal, couple, the two experience a renewal in their romance. In describing their relationship, they “often said they found it difficult to remember that the other was a separate person” (17); they were completely comfortable with each other, and knew so much about each other that they spent the majority of their time together in silence. Additionally, their lovemaking was shown as a very gentle, relaxed process, with a lot of the times resulting in one of the two falling asleep.
 
After meeting Robert and venturing to his and Caroline’s house, the two felt a new spark and their views and actions completely changed. What once were uninspired conversations were turned to heated, interesting debates and deep discussions that lasted all hours of the night. Their sex life also changed to extremely passionate and much more frequent. All in all, the two found a new, kindled fire. They took advantage of it and experienced a rebirth in their relationship, rediscovering themselves and each other’s histories.
 
I love this time period and the cultural aspect of it. The books we’ve read from this era thus far have all been wonderful and I’ve fully enjoyed all that the descriptions of social life have offered, however, all the books have ended tragically, with deaths in three out of four of them, and one ending in heart break. Although it wasn’t smart of Mary and Colin to enter Robert’s residence after leaving the first time, I didn’t feel the need or see the justification for Colin’s death; it seemed very sudden and unnecessary. Another aspect of the plot that confused me was at the beach when Mary swam out into the ocean. From the description McEwan provided, I thought Mary was being attacked by a shark or was drowning, but when Colin simply swam out and rescued her, I felt it was a bit random. Despite these two bits, I thoroughly enjoyed the book as a whole, including all the parts that were terribly weird, and, of course, the cultural descriptions. 

The differentiation and role of gender in The Comfort of Strangers, by Ian McEwan, develops as a theme throughout the story. The roles exhibited by males and females are, in certain ways, clearly defined but in other, quite uncertain. Colin and Mary are often referred to as a unit; it is rare to find them apart from each other and they seem to make decisions as a group. Mary does not clean their hotel room as a woman would be expected to do, conventionally, and Colin does not assert his opinion with her as a man usually would. An example of this was when he knew they needed a map so that they wouldn’t get lost but he never said anything. Their relationship stands in stark contrast to that of Robert and Caroline, where the male and female roles are hyper traditional. From the onset, Caroline is subservient and seemingly absent minded in her relationship. She lacks and decision-making skills and simply follows what Robert has taught her. During their first visit to the house, Colin and Mary seemed to accept Robert and Caroline’s hospitality without much question; they appeared mesmerized with the couple and their different ways. “She said neutrally, ‘You know more about it than I do, I’ve never been there.” This statement from Caroline to Mary about Robert’s bar shows Caroline’s indifference to the fact that she has never been to her husbands place of work. It is as if she wouldn’t have expected to, although usually in society we believe the opposite.
 
Caroline and Robert’s obsession with Colin crosses the gender lines as well. Caroline says, “Colin is very beautiful. Robert said he was.” It is strange that although this couple places a lot of importance of the role of the man vs. the woman, Robert has no problem admitting to finding another man attractive. Further, when Mary describes Colin’s body she makes him sound feminine and womanly. “His arms were crossed fetally over his chest: his slender, hairless legs were set a little apart, the feet, abnormally small like a child’s, pointing inwards.” This detriment to Colin’s masculinity came about upon entering Robert and Caroline’s house, insinuating that their values were becoming known to the other couple. The confusion continues as the couple leaves Robert’s home and automatically they are more attracted to each other than before. For what reason did being in that odd situation being the couple closer together? It seems as though their genders were further defined by meeting Robert and Caroline.
 
In the end, the apparently necessary division between genders caused the death of Colin and the fleeing of Robert and Caroline. The bizarre ways of the latter couple were solely based on gender definition and the importance they placed on it. In acting as one person, gender ambiguous, Mary and Colin were content but once they ventured into drawing lines and categories, they met their downfall.

The Comfort of Strangers was a surrealistic, almost dystopian novel that truly disturbed me and left me with a sick feeling when I finished it. The ending was a complete turnabout from the beginning; I thought I was reading a novel about yet another couple that travels to try and "mix things up" in their lives. In the beginning, it does seem like this is the case, but that is precisely why I think McEwan twists the tale into such a gruesome shape. 
I paid a lot of attention to the characterization of Mary and Colin's relationship. They are so close that they "often forgot that they were two separate people." In a sense, this lack of individualization in the relationship proves to be a point of major vulnerability. The fact that Mary and Colin were so emotionally invested in their relationship made them susceptible to Robert's tricks. I was confused about what McEwan was trying to portray about human sexuality in this novel. The sexual nature of Mary and Colin's relationship changes throughout the novel. Before they meet Robert and Caroline, it is suggested that they have very little sex life and do not derive much pleasure from intimacy. But after their first encounter with Robert, they adopt a leisurely, sensual lifestyle- they indulge in sex, sleep, and drugs. By the end, they are irreparably damaged. 
Caroline seems to be a representation of the obsequiousness that takes root in human sexuality. She admits that she enjoys the pain, while Robert tells Colin that women only pretend to want freedom, and really crave domination. To me, this extreme level of disturbance made me wonder if McEwan was trying to show the destructive possibilities of sex, how people can turn it into something to manipulate and destruct. 
I think that purpose of inserting all of these themes into a travel novel was tie the nature of human sexuality into the human desire of exploration and discovery. Like sex, traveling can incite both excitement and fear of the unknown. Traveling instills a vulnerability, making the voyagers blank slates in new places, opening their eyes to new experiences and new sounds, smells, tastes. It is difficult to know when to trust and when not to trust when we are in unfamiliar lands. 

I found this book to be extremely disturbing for several reasons. The ending of course was extremely gruesome and frightening and almost led me to put down the book and refuse to finish it. The very fact that I couldn’t put the book down even though it frightened me bothered me as well. I was also strongly bothered by the book because I was in Venice just this past summer. What troubled me the most about this book, however was that Mary and Colin continued to return to Robert and Caroline’s house despite all the warnings that Robert and Caroline were up to something. This question hung in the air throughout my reading of the book and I still can’t quite understand what led Mary and Colin to trust the creepy Venetian couple.
 
Mary and Colin’s very first encounter with Robert (on the street at night) is already slightly ominous and foreshadows the rest of their “friendship.” The way Robert grips both of their wrists would have caused me to turn and run, but for some reason Mary and Colin don’t question this action too heavily. This “grip” runs as a motif throughout the rest of the novella and comes to symbolize that Mary and Colin are, in a way trapped. Although I understand this concept, I still don’t get why they were trapped! It seems almost as if they go to their doom willingly…
 
The only motive I see as maybe having caused Colin and Mary to return to Caroline and Robert’s house is that somehow the couples’ interactions repaired Colin and Mary’s stale relationship. It comes across that maybe some of Robert and Caroline’s overly intense and destructive sexuality gets in a sense transferred to Mary and Colin whose sexuality (after 7 years) has become complete without passion or real desire. After spending time with Robert and Caroline, Mary and Colin stay closed up in their hotel room having the best sex they’ve had in a long time. This further repairs their emotional connection as well. Maybe this newfound connection entices them and causes them to delve deeper into their relationship with Robert and Caroline, but I still don’t understand how Mary and Colin can be so blind to such obvious ominous hints such as Caroline’s plea for help, Robert’s punch in the stomach or the snooping photograph of Colin that Mary sees. When Caroline drugs Mary at the climax of the novel, my first thought was that it seemed as if in a way Mary had been drugged the entire story (maybe this is implied with the repeated use of Marijuana?).
 
The questions I’m asking in this post are actually real queries that intrigue me, not discussion questions. I would really appreciate if anyone who has any opinions on the matter would comment!  

The themes of domination and exoticness are central to Ian McEwan’s The Comfort of Stranger. Mary and Colin, who have been lovers for several years, find themselves in an unnamed city—implied to be Venice—where they are caught in their routine of exploring the city, eating dinner, and then engaging in lovemaking where there “was no longer a great passion” (17). Sexual relations are implied to be scarce between Mary and Colin. Overall there is a sense of familiarity and routine in the relationship between Mary and Colin that seems to have emerged from their years together. Furthermore, when reading of a feminist movement happening in the area, Mary expresses her views about the subject, effectively asserting her independence and conveying to the reader a sense of equality between herself and Colin. However, The sense of equality and familiarity that seem to be the defining characteristics of Mary and Colin’s relationship seem to completely disappear once they encounter Robert and Caroline. Robert and Caroline are presented not only as stark contrast to Colin and Mary, but only to serve as a catalyst in their relationship. Thus, Mary and Colin’s encounters with Robert and Caroline ultimately bring up themes of domination and the exotic.
 
At first, the relationship between Robert and Caroline is difficult to understand though obviously somehow deviant. As Mary and Colin stay longer and Robert’s house, it is becomes more obvious that Caroline is a virtual prisoner in her own home. When Mary and Colin leave the first time, they are disturbed by the experience, though they do not discuss it openly. However, it is interesting to note how Robert’s domination over Caroline affects their sex life. Mary and Colin begin sleep together more frequently and talk more frankly about their fantasies—these fantasies have obvious sadomasochistic elements to them. Robert and Caroline’s relationship dominant/submissive relationship has changed the way Mary and Colin viewed their sexuality. Colin, in particular, seemed entranced by the way that Caroline responded to Robert’s abuse and domination. Later, when Mary and Colin again encounter Robert and Caroline this theme continues to be examined. Caroline relates to Mary how Robert began to beat her during her lovemaking, but how she began to associate pleasure with the pain. As she says, “I loved being punished” (110). Caroline then confesses Robert took it too far one day, nearly killed her, and badly hurt her back, leaving her an invalid. Caroline might enjoy the domination, but it is far from a consensual relationship. There is always the question of consent. Overall, Mary, Colin, and Caroline are never able to consent to what happens to them. Pleasure might be able to be derived from domination, but that does not imply consent. Thus, domination remains a consistent theme throughout the book.
 
Finally, Robert and Caroline provide Colin and Mary a sense of the exotic, which alters the overall mood of their trip and influences their subsequent change in behavior (their increased lovemaking, etc.). Overall, Robert is described more exotically than Caroline. Physically, he appears to have Mediterranean features, wears a razor on a necklace, and wears a sweet cologne. He lives in a house that acts a museum of a time forgotten. His mannerisms are outdated. However, it is his behavior that is more exotic. His sexuality is an oddity. Though he appears to be primarily heterosexual—albeit deviant in heterosexual behavior—he shows bisexual behavior. He parades Colin around, telling locals that Colin is his lover, and later on caressing Colin before killing him. In sum, Robert has the look of a foreigner and sexual deviant behavior—he is exotic. It is through Colin and Mary’s interaction with Robert that they are able to change their own behaviors. Once again, they speak freely of their sadomasochist fantasies and have sex more often. They break out of their routine, which is ultimately the purpose of any vacation. Thus, the encounter with the exotic is an important aspect of The Comfort of Strangers because it acts as a catalyst in Colin and Mary’s relationship.
 

In Comfort of Strangers, the themes: traveler vs tourist and the roles of genders come up repeatedly. Mary and Colin are on vacation and they visit tourist sites that they feel obligated to visit. “Her[Mary] commitment was to museums and restaurants”(14). They lounge about the hotel at times leaving only to go to the café across the street.

At one point, Mary condescends Colin for not having shaven and Colin responds, “’Remember…we’re on holiday’” (43). The phrase “on holiday” recurs alternating who says it. Mary and Colin feel the need to remind each other to enjoy their holiday together. Touristy traits come through until they find the authentic: Robert who owns a bar constantly filled with real locals. Colin and Mary find Robert strange, but are attracted by the way his realness and they find themselves together often.

It’s ironic how Far-Left Venice is compared to their home, and the one woman they get to know, Caroline, has such traditional beliefs. At the beginning of the novel, Mary notices flyers against a palace wall as she walks around the city. The number of women’s activists posters as well as Far-Left posters surprises her. She might think Venice is becoming very liberal until she meets Caroline.

Mary tells Caroline of her experience as an actress, which intrigues Caroline until she mentions the all-female acting group. Caroline could not conceive how the group couldn’t have men in it when male-female relations play a large role in most plays. In response to her disbelief, Mary supposes that two women could meet and have a conversation on a balcony. Caroline says, “’Oh yes, but they’re probably waiting for a man’” (67), because in tradition a man would come in and swoop one of them away. She wants the roles of men and women to stay the same. She can be dominated and enjoy the helplessness hence the rough sex.

Robert too believes men ought to be men. They need strength and aggression, but men are slowly changing as women fight for their rights. Speaking of the present, Robert says, “’Now men doubt themselves, they hate themselves…Women treat men like children, because they can’t take them seriously,’” (71) since men actually consider the opinions of women and listen when they speak now. Robert and Caroline’s opinions strongly contrast those of the other Venetians. 

For some, the attraction of travel has much to do with the desire to lose one’s self in the narrow winding streets of a foreign city. This desire for loss of familiarity is what drives people to the strange and, in McEwan’s novel, what draws them to the comfort of strangers.  Along the streets of what “may or may not be Venice,” Mary and Colin frequently find themselves both bound and at odds with the alikeness they have come to find with one another. This oneness is reflected in the display window of a shop where they both separately notice that, “the dummies were from the same mold,”(21) and in Caroline’s observations of the pair’s physical similarities being “both so finely built, almost like twins.” (66)

These apparent similarities come into play not only in their appearance but also in the recurrence of their sexual interactions, which McEwan’s narrator describes as having an “unhurried friendliness, the familiarity of its rituals and procedures, the secure, precision-fit of limbs and bodies, comfortable, like a cast returned to its mold,” (17). The fact that we are again brought back to the notion of the mold reminds the reader that Mary and Colin are aware of one another to such an extreme extent that there is little excitement or novelty in their exchanges. We can understand that this lack of exhilaration is perhaps what motivated them to travel in the first place and that their familiarity is “rather like too many suitcases…a matter of perpetual concern,” (13).

I think the comparison between their excessive closeness and too many suitcases makes a very telling point of their relationship and how it drives them to explore their desires for travel, and why it does not allow them to fully detach from their previous realities.  While they are in a sense escaping their home lives, they end up growing accustomed to a different type of normalcy abroad that functions in the same mundane way as one at home might. Prior to their trip, Colin was clearly separated from Mary and her children, but during their travels they were able to momentarily erase this division.

In a number of circumstances, especially after their visit to Caroline and Robert’s, they were successful in joining themselves fully and being able to rediscover a sense of passion. But there were also several instances, when their togetherness proved to frustrate the pair and when a familiarity with their hotel room and the unseen help of a maid caused them to grow lazy and dependent. It’s fascinating to consider the fact that growing too “comfortable” in any setting or with any individual can cause the same emotions as being at home.

The influence of home and its inescapability highlights the presence and prevalence of reality. That reality is woven throughout the novel through the postcards that Mary writes to her children on the first day of her trip, yet that remain without stamps until she departs. It’s interesting to consider the fact that she never mails them, yet she is reminded of her children several times throughout the journey and vocalizes a desire to reach out to them and sometimes even to have never left them in the first place. It is moments like this when McEwan forces the reader to question whether Mary really ever wanted to escape in the first place or if Colin had pushed the idea upon her.

McEwan also brings up another subject for examination in the work: the question whether it is ever possible to really escape one’s troubles or the weight of home. I believe that his connection of their closeness to the suitcases that often function as physical objects that drag the travelers down, makes the statement that the simple idea of them going away together prevents any possibility for them to really escape. McEwan makes this point with his discussion that “alone, perhaps, they each could have explored the city with pleasure,” (13) but together it was difficult for them to fully rid themselves of familiarity. 

McEwan, Ian, the comfort of strangers

The two key components of The Comfort of Strangers that struck me were gender and violence. Throughout the novel, gender is mentioned in a really modern way that is different from the way it has been addressed in the other books that we have read for class. One example that immediately comes to mind is the scenes in which Mary and Colin talk about the “far-left” feminist posters pasted on the wall of an old manor.

When Mary first sees the posters, she comments almost admiringly about how much more radical and better organized the feminist groups are in what we can assume is Venice as compared to the ones back at home. Colin, who seems to be all in favor of women’s struggle for equality, matter-of-factly remarks, “They’ve got more to fight for,” as if to suggest that back home, where the political climate is more modern and progressive, conditions for women are better, so feminism is not as attractive to women as it is in Venice.
 
Interestingly enough, at this point in the novel, there has been no mention of sexism or sexist attitudes in Venice, but there has been some mention of the discussion of sexual politics by Colin and Mary. Although both characters seem sympathetic towards the plight of women living in oppressive societies, they differ in the way that they approach the issue, which is highlighted when Mary mentions the Venetian feminists’ proclamation that convicted rapists should be castrated. One would expect that a woman would feel more passionately about feminism as women are the ones directly affected by sexism, but Mary’s fascination with the tactic of using castration as a punishment for rape to make people take rape more seriously marginalizes to some extent the sympathy that Colin feels towards what he would normally consider a noble cause.

After Mary brings to his attention the idea of castration, Colin sarcastically quips about cutting off the hands of thieves and reasonably concludes that the idea is silly and would only lead to feminists being taken less seriously, which leads Mary to comment, “people take hanging seriously enough,” before continuing on down the street. As Colin “uneasily” watches her go, the narrator leaves the cause of his uneasiness ambiguous, as he could as easily be upset by her fascination with violent feminist politics as he could be with the fact that she is leading him down a darkened street in a foreign place.

Later after they meet Robert, he sees Mary once again eying the feminist posters and dismisses them as the work of ugly women who cannot find a man and want to destroy “everything that is good between man and women”. Mary watches him as she would a face on television and Colin jokingly says, “meet the opposition,” but instead of arguing with Robert or making any sign of dissent known, she smiles sweetly at both Colin and Robert and suggests that they go get some food. Mary’s refusal to counter or even point out Robert’s obvious sexist remarks could be read as cowardice, but as we learn later in the novel when she visits Robert and Caroline’s home, she is not afraid to talk openly about her support of feminist politics, which makes this incident curious.